I don’t know about you, but my head is spinning with all the theories out there about who will win this presidential election and why.

I’m as guilty of promulgating them as anyone. Ask any political consultant for a prediction on a race — on anything really — and we’ll take you on a trip around the world. We’re worse than the commentators before an NFL game:

“I’ll tell you, Steve, no lefthanded president who has lost the Methodist vote in Wisconsin has ever been re-elected in a year that ends with the number two…”

This is my firm and final theory then — it is also my first incidentally — on why I think Mitt Romney will be the next president of the United States: